Power Rangers Ninja Steel "The Royal Rumble"

learned:

* Monty: um, Green Ranger, sorry i mean Princess Viera, what's your name?
Ruby Love: Ruby Love.
Monty: Ruby Love? so the porn rumors are correct.

* previously on Power Rangers.....make sure those suits get steam-cleaned, we don't know where they've been......

* Drillion: can i hit a woman on a kid's show?
Madame Odius: i'm not a woman, i'm a babe. you're thinking of that other show filmed here.

* Madame Odius: i'll help you destroy the Rangers quicker!
Drillion: how do i know i can trust you?
Madame Odius: think of me not as a woman but as your dealer.

* Monty: is this episode the performance-enhancing-drugs lesson?
Victor: no this is just some silly gem which makes stones weightless. think about our jobs, Monty.
Monty: what do you mean?
Victor: we do this. we wake up each morning and we perform these stupid characters. this is what we do.

* Mick: i'm a serious Shakespearean actor. i do not belong on this set for multiple reasons.

* Viera: sex slaves?
Mick: no, but slaves are slaves.
Viera: when did this show get dark?
Chip Lynn: i couldn't take it anymore.

* Victor: can i use the anti-grav crystal to lift up Sarah's skirt?
Monty: women don't wear skirts anymore. Sarah wears skateboard pants.
Victor: drat! that's the price of progress for ya.

* Mick: hey who's been sniffing up all my secret stash?

* Redbot: do you still think of me?
Hayley: no.
Redbot: i'm the real Calvin. your Calvin is a robot.

* Victor: my Monty, my Monty, my kingdom for a Monty!
Monty: married couples do the wheelbarrow race. jus sayin'

* Victor: did you get a flyer?
Sarah: no.
Victor: you're lucky this is a kid's show. all i want to do is impress you, Sarah. what can i do?
Sarah: beat me in a hoverboard race.
Victor: that's a future episode, gotta be.

* Mick: and this is how you make my mama's famous old-fashioned red sauce. my mom drowned in lava on the Lion Galaxy, that's what i was told as a kid, so that's what the red sauce commemorates.

* Dude Perfect is on Nickelodeon. Dude Perfect was the last family-friendly thing on youtube...

* Ruby Love: when that star came out and branded me i got bad flashbacks...

* Princess Viera: so i'm a ninja now?
Mick: previous season, we did that already. can you teach me how to cum?

* Rangers: *singing* I can still hear you saying you would never break the chain never break the chain...

* Rangers: that was an extra-explodey explosion. should we get Michael Bay to direct the next movie?
Drillion: sure. the franchise is already a flop.

* Viera: you've got a strong arm.
Mick: pitched minor-leagues for the Yankees.
Viera: a lot of Australian athletes play professional and college American sports for some reason.
Mick: New Zealand.
Viera: same thing.
Mick: it's the only way to leave the island. i was the only Australian actor in history to ever flunk my Neighbours audition.

* Sarah: i'm worried about you, Brody, you have too much power!
Brody: i feel the Voltron electricity flowing within me! I AM THE REINCARNATION OF SVEN!!!
Sarah: not cool, dude. don't play with people's emotions like that. when do we get together?
Brody: Chip said it's gonna be a Super ship.

* Viera: Mick i have a surprise for you. a video link to your folks.
Mick: you had this the whole time and you were holding out on me, bitch? i should pimpslap your ass...
Sarah and Hayley hold Mick back.
Mick: sorry, some of my Shakepeare leaked out.

* Mick: these are my real parents.
mom and dad: of course we are. how do you think you got the part?
Mick: there are flying cars where you are? we don't have flying cars.

* mom and dad: are you coming home?
Mick: of course i'm coming home! fuck the Power Rangers!

* mom: oh Micklepoo...
Mick: way to ruin it as always, ma! wait, is that a space shuttle i see zooming past in the background? we don't have space exploration anymore, NASA went bankrupt to build a wall.

* Mick: can i give you a hug?
Ruby Love: no touching of the talent.
Mick: this L sign is Lion Galaxy, not loser.

* Mick: will Victor break the weightlifting record? we shall all soon clap and see!
Principal: get back to work, janitor, this isn't for you.

* Victor coughs on the white powder he claps.

* student: hi, i'm the black girl on the show.