Justice League Action "Superman Red Vs. Superman Blue"

learned:

* spoilers: it's not just Superman.

* woman: he's stolen the pulse regulator!................i'm Lois Lane.

* Lex Luthor: this is just what i need! with this battery i can power up my shakeweight. that was Amber Tamblyn on the phone just now. she called off our date suddenly.

* so blue is the emo side and red is the loving side, right?

* Lex: i carried the 1. but i forgot to carry the 2.

* Blue Superman: wanna split a malted?
Red Superman: i only drink Tecate.
Blue Supes stops Red Supes from punching Lex for some reason.

* Lex: this show is so good it needs to be seen whilst eating popcorn. as in THIS show, Justice League Action.

* Lex: stand back, woman! i don't know what this emitter will do.....okay so this gun must be fired at you cos the plot demands we hint at some sort of foursome or something.

* Red Wonder Woman: i'm gonna kick your ass!
Blue Wonder Woman: do whatever you want to me, i won't fight back.
Lex: i don't need popcorn, i need lotion!

* Red Superman: let's take over the world.
Wonder Woman: finally i'm not embarrassed to date you.

* Blue Wonder Woman: allow us to escort you to your lovely prison cell.
Lex: as long as i can talk to Guard Green Arrow i'll be fine. he is quite the conversationalist.

* Blue Wonder Woman: you like turkey meatloaf?
Lex: only with ketchup.
Blue Superman: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, red.

* Green Arrow: what's with all the hip-hip-hooray cheering?
Blue Superman and Blue Wonder Woman: no we were chanting HIP HIP FOREPLAY. this is our sex ritual. this is our foreplay.

* Red Wonder Woman: i'll grind you into paste.
Green Arrow: in bed?
Red Wonder Woman: what?
Green Arrow: i like a bad woman.
Red Wonder Woman: Blue's the one with the sex ritual.

* Red Batman: truce?
Blue Batman: yes i am Bruce. so are you. wait..............ugh! you have to help me!
Red Batman: what is it?
Blue Batman: i'm trying to smile but my mouth won't let me.

* Red Batman: you're too small!
Red Wonder Woman: i'll kick your ass if you tell me i need to smile more.
Red Batman: we'll split...
Red Superman: i only drink Tecate.

* Batman: i was having the most wonderfullest dream. my name was Adam. and i was in Heaven.

* Blue Batman: i'm only gonna say this once: i forgive you. okay twice. i became Born-Again after my parents died.

* Red Lex Luthor: perhaps i can be of some assistance. i'm acting now.

* Green Arrow: you can't change me. there's already a Red Hood.

* M. Night: TWIST!
Lex: hey man, where'd you go?
M. Night: Avatar II was WAY over-budget.

* Green Arrow: you whacked the Blue Lex with a chair.
Red Lex: i always wanted to be a wrestling heel.
Superman: that's basically what your character is.

* Green Arrow: wait, a good Lex would be good for the world.
Lex: but not good for sales. look what's happened over at Marvel. people are stupid and simple-minded and don't want diversity. change is bad.

* Lex: i can't believe i betrayed myself! that's brilliant!
Wonder Woman: or sad.
James Woods: i haven't given up. i'll place a call to the studio. David Cross is bald, he'll play Lex Luthor in the movie. i'll come on set as a consultant...