learned:
* I love you, Justin!
* Family Feud: did Justin let slip the closely-guarded secret that Jimmy sniffs...his nose?
* twin-bed sex music video: so then that scene with Cecily Strong and Mike O'Brien in bed together wasn't just for the skit, that was a little peek into their private life...
* Justin as the musical guest: now see, 1984 wouldn't have been so bad to get through if it had been like this.
* it is true that Ebenezer Scrooge seemed gayer when he was younger. as his mom would say, "sure, we know, Ebenezer was always such a happy boy!" that was lifted directly from the Three's Company where Jack's mom visits.
* Baby, It's Cold Outside: awwww, Show is being sweet again...
* this episode's bill will be astronomical with all the celebrity cameos they stuffed in. the least they could have done was have a massive ice ending at the end. wouldn't it have been gnarly to see Madonna on skates?
* Drake: there better be a Degrassi skit, I'm waiting for that SNL Degrassi skit, it's the only thing I'm living for...
NOTES FROM MY NETHER / only the finest programs of television / your host this evening is early and wears no robe, 83optics on youtube but you know him better as THE LATE PHOENIX / come and mull over the monastery mulled wine, see what's on / N O T E S
Sunday, December 22, 2013
Saturday, December 21, 2013
The Haunting Hour "Uncle Howee" Episode Discussion
learned:
* so far, more cool than scary. I mean, five-year-old me would have LOVED it if Grover from Sesame Street would have talked directly to me through the tv screen using my name. that would have been magical, not dark.
* dude, at least get a new plate for those gross fish sticks...
* "my mom is such a drag, she's like this nurse or something that helps sick and injured people. I know, bro, I know, she just doesn't get me, slackers who want to see movies have rights, too, ya feel me?"
* again, not scary, who WOULDN'T want to be friends with the Ice King?
* if you ever wanted to know how Spongebob would sound like truly menacing...
* this piece was ruined by the brother's bad acting. he was trying to be your typical bored, put-upon teenager, but he was too lackadaisical and not spiteful enough. the writing called for him to be a bully, but it came out as him just being a pathetic sad sack. the sister didn't ever really seem threatened by him, she saw him for the powerless loser that he was.
* series finale? if so, it had a good run. yes, this last season was definitely not as sharp as the previous two, but overall, this was a good effort. I'm a sucker for these kinds of shows, I'll always watch and be a fan of young-adult Canadian anthologies, the tv landscape is poorer whenever we don't see grey skies, weirdness, and smart-mouthed kids from broken homes. remember also, this is horror, but horror for kids, they can't really go all the way with things, y'know? no episode in this series freaked me out to the point where I couldn't go to sleep that night, but you could tell they tried, and they cared. they were giving it their all to make a good show, not just another show. it showed.
* so far, more cool than scary. I mean, five-year-old me would have LOVED it if Grover from Sesame Street would have talked directly to me through the tv screen using my name. that would have been magical, not dark.
* dude, at least get a new plate for those gross fish sticks...
* "my mom is such a drag, she's like this nurse or something that helps sick and injured people. I know, bro, I know, she just doesn't get me, slackers who want to see movies have rights, too, ya feel me?"
* again, not scary, who WOULDN'T want to be friends with the Ice King?
* if you ever wanted to know how Spongebob would sound like truly menacing...
* this piece was ruined by the brother's bad acting. he was trying to be your typical bored, put-upon teenager, but he was too lackadaisical and not spiteful enough. the writing called for him to be a bully, but it came out as him just being a pathetic sad sack. the sister didn't ever really seem threatened by him, she saw him for the powerless loser that he was.
* series finale? if so, it had a good run. yes, this last season was definitely not as sharp as the previous two, but overall, this was a good effort. I'm a sucker for these kinds of shows, I'll always watch and be a fan of young-adult Canadian anthologies, the tv landscape is poorer whenever we don't see grey skies, weirdness, and smart-mouthed kids from broken homes. remember also, this is horror, but horror for kids, they can't really go all the way with things, y'know? no episode in this series freaked me out to the point where I couldn't go to sleep that night, but you could tell they tried, and they cared. they were giving it their all to make a good show, not just another show. it showed.
Spooksville "The Dark Corner" Episode Discussion
learned:
* Watch me bug Watch with my double negatives and wrong plurals: can you not not believe we have to wait 'til March for new Spooksville? I am not one of the sheeps, I love this show for personal reasons, not just 'cause it's the hot fad currently.
* I'm afraid to look up Scandinavian fire drill on urbandictionary...it's something sexual, huh?
* Ann never stepped foot in a library, she used magic to read all the spells for her. who needs books?...except for spell books of course. Ann isn't another tragic case of illiteracy, she's a witch, she's a success story...
* Ninja Ex Machina
* Adam, I hate to break up this touching scene, but that isn't your mother...that's a stunt double.
* this show is literally the ONLY reason I have to live for the next three months...
* Watch me bug Watch with my double negatives and wrong plurals: can you not not believe we have to wait 'til March for new Spooksville? I am not one of the sheeps, I love this show for personal reasons, not just 'cause it's the hot fad currently.
* I'm afraid to look up Scandinavian fire drill on urbandictionary...it's something sexual, huh?
* Ann never stepped foot in a library, she used magic to read all the spells for her. who needs books?...except for spell books of course. Ann isn't another tragic case of illiteracy, she's a witch, she's a success story...
* Ninja Ex Machina
* Adam, I hate to break up this touching scene, but that isn't your mother...that's a stunt double.
* this show is literally the ONLY reason I have to live for the next three months...
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Saturday Night Live John Goodman / Kings of Leon Episode Discussion
learned:
* booty would solve my holiday blues...
* Dance of the Snowflakes: I just realized this skit was dumb...
* Three Wise Guys: that isn't how it happened? also, how does this recounting square with the universe being a hologram?
* Kings of Leon: hold up, I guess I got the wrong impression here, I always thought this band oozed sexual energy and women the world over would offer their soaked panties to them whenever. what we got was more subdued---good, but subdued--with a lead singer in a pink sweater.
* Weekend Update: will Stefon be there on Seth's last day?...
* yes, I'd enjoy watching Phylicia Rashad sleep...
* Shallon is a tragic figure for me, she's the one who is too cool for her own good. she sees the world so clearly, but will end up a premature death from slipping on a banana peel or something.
* are the Last Call skits supposed to be disgusting? I find them hot. I relate to them. that's me on screen.
* speaking of subdued, the audience was subdued all night, not much for John Goodman, and surprisingly the Sex Kings of Leon got more of a polite clap than a female roar of rapture. holiday blues? they only started to pick up with the Last Call skit, but that's just 'cause they were drunk...
* booty would solve my holiday blues...
* Dance of the Snowflakes: I just realized this skit was dumb...
* Three Wise Guys: that isn't how it happened? also, how does this recounting square with the universe being a hologram?
* Kings of Leon: hold up, I guess I got the wrong impression here, I always thought this band oozed sexual energy and women the world over would offer their soaked panties to them whenever. what we got was more subdued---good, but subdued--with a lead singer in a pink sweater.
* Weekend Update: will Stefon be there on Seth's last day?...
* yes, I'd enjoy watching Phylicia Rashad sleep...
* Shallon is a tragic figure for me, she's the one who is too cool for her own good. she sees the world so clearly, but will end up a premature death from slipping on a banana peel or something.
* are the Last Call skits supposed to be disgusting? I find them hot. I relate to them. that's me on screen.
* speaking of subdued, the audience was subdued all night, not much for John Goodman, and surprisingly the Sex Kings of Leon got more of a polite clap than a female roar of rapture. holiday blues? they only started to pick up with the Last Call skit, but that's just 'cause they were drunk...
Saturday, December 14, 2013
The Haunting Hour "Toy Train" Episode Discussion
learned:
* Velcro, Velcro is the answer to the shoelaces conundrum.
* did you notice that the man who knew the father as a kid during the train incident slightly flubbed his line but they kept it in anyway? I like that, it adds a certain realistic, documentary feel to the piece.
* the kid with the wild hair who turns out to be the father as a kid looks like Lord of the Flies right before they all went feral.
* I'm with the wild-child kid, the pound sign does look like a menacing closed fist ready to punch...
* everyone's first exposure to elongated coins: Disneyland.
* Velcro, Velcro is the answer to the shoelaces conundrum.
* did you notice that the man who knew the father as a kid during the train incident slightly flubbed his line but they kept it in anyway? I like that, it adds a certain realistic, documentary feel to the piece.
* the kid with the wild hair who turns out to be the father as a kid looks like Lord of the Flies right before they all went feral.
* I'm with the wild-child kid, the pound sign does look like a menacing closed fist ready to punch...
* everyone's first exposure to elongated coins: Disneyland.
Spooksville "The No-Ones" Episode Discussion
I guess there's no ignoring Spooksville anymore. it's simply a great horror/supernatural show, imbued with the distinctive Canadian grey skies of shows like early The X-Files and harkening back to quality '90s shows where the young characters were interested in more than becoming singing stars. Katie Douglas is a revelation as short, whipsmart Sally. for someone so young, this girl already has seasoned acting chops.
learned:
* the alien girl: perfect exotic alien look, not the most emotive actress, the scene at the end where she really needed to sell her high-drama stakes came out flat. she was a little too quiet and mumbly for me.
* Watch mentions the Autism Spectrum, which I'm noticing more and more the longer I encounter folk online...
* only Sally is small enough to fit into small wagons and, well, tiny mouse holes I suspect next.
* Ann and Sally are forever linked, so Ann kissed Adam along with Sally during that CPR kiss. I'm just building the catfight tension between the two girls for next time, I love it when these two rivals are forced to share scenes together. deep down you know they're learning to care for each other like sisters...
* touching scene with Watch and his mom. Mom talks about accepting yourself, Watch promises to be a better son. I always get choked up during those awkward family moments of half-hugs and the use of the term "better son."
* wow, that was one sumptuous kiss on the cheek there! Sally immediately points to the mistletoe as the reason, but this definitely gives those Satch shippers something to ponder.
learned:
* the alien girl: perfect exotic alien look, not the most emotive actress, the scene at the end where she really needed to sell her high-drama stakes came out flat. she was a little too quiet and mumbly for me.
* Watch mentions the Autism Spectrum, which I'm noticing more and more the longer I encounter folk online...
* only Sally is small enough to fit into small wagons and, well, tiny mouse holes I suspect next.
* Ann and Sally are forever linked, so Ann kissed Adam along with Sally during that CPR kiss. I'm just building the catfight tension between the two girls for next time, I love it when these two rivals are forced to share scenes together. deep down you know they're learning to care for each other like sisters...
* touching scene with Watch and his mom. Mom talks about accepting yourself, Watch promises to be a better son. I always get choked up during those awkward family moments of half-hugs and the use of the term "better son."
* wow, that was one sumptuous kiss on the cheek there! Sally immediately points to the mistletoe as the reason, but this definitely gives those Satch shippers something to ponder.
Sunday, December 8, 2013
Saturday Night Live Paul Rudd / One Direction Episode Discussion
learned:
* i know, right? The Sound of Music has been in my consciousness all week ever since the live event, i've been singing all the old songs again and confirming to myself that this is the greatest musical of all time. i've stabbed myself with so many nostalgia arrows, it...well, yeah, and i guess SNL felt the same way as me and had to express it in a skit.
* One Direction: when they sing individually, their voices are awkward and low. when they sing together, they produce an angelic, brilliant, loud chorus. not sayin' anything fishy is going on backstage, just sayin'.
* the Black Christmas movie for white people: racist...but that was exactly the point...right?
* the "NEXT!" critic who hates everything has a creepy obsession with Jesus.
* that was the most cynical portrayal of Santa i've ever seen...though i accept the new Mrs. Claus...
* yes, Paul Rudd, i agree, after the Cecily/Nasim thing hit our imaginations, we all need to take a play-with-yourself break. i'll be right back in one minute to this scintillating review...
* was it just me, or were they actually EARLY one minute at the end of the show? that, like, never happens.
* i know, right? The Sound of Music has been in my consciousness all week ever since the live event, i've been singing all the old songs again and confirming to myself that this is the greatest musical of all time. i've stabbed myself with so many nostalgia arrows, it...well, yeah, and i guess SNL felt the same way as me and had to express it in a skit.
* One Direction: when they sing individually, their voices are awkward and low. when they sing together, they produce an angelic, brilliant, loud chorus. not sayin' anything fishy is going on backstage, just sayin'.
* the Black Christmas movie for white people: racist...but that was exactly the point...right?
* the "NEXT!" critic who hates everything has a creepy obsession with Jesus.
* that was the most cynical portrayal of Santa i've ever seen...though i accept the new Mrs. Claus...
* yes, Paul Rudd, i agree, after the Cecily/Nasim thing hit our imaginations, we all need to take a play-with-yourself break. i'll be right back in one minute to this scintillating review...
* was it just me, or were they actually EARLY one minute at the end of the show? that, like, never happens.
Saturday, December 7, 2013
The Haunting Hour "Bad Egg" Episode Discussion
learned:
* it's the egg-as-your-child trope, gird your loins.
* THIS IS AN UNAUTHORIZED AREA THAT PROTECTS SENSITIVE MATERIAL AND LIFE FORMS, IT GETS FUMIGATED HOURLY FOR CIGARETTE SMOKING SMOKE
* there's a thin line between joking around in class and serial killer: the boy with the fro
* there's a thin line between military rigor and serial killer: the father
* come on, Cigarette Smoking Man, i thought you were smarter than this! you sifted through the boy's laundry but didn't check the white bag over his shoulder?
* the mom wants nothing to do with her family, she wants to just go back to her ladies (read: lesbian orgy).
* the ending: yep, see, serial killer, but at least he'll have a cool sidekick along with him on his spree.
* it's the egg-as-your-child trope, gird your loins.
* THIS IS AN UNAUTHORIZED AREA THAT PROTECTS SENSITIVE MATERIAL AND LIFE FORMS, IT GETS FUMIGATED HOURLY FOR CIGARETTE SMOKING SMOKE
* there's a thin line between joking around in class and serial killer: the boy with the fro
* there's a thin line between military rigor and serial killer: the father
* come on, Cigarette Smoking Man, i thought you were smarter than this! you sifted through the boy's laundry but didn't check the white bag over his shoulder?
* the mom wants nothing to do with her family, she wants to just go back to her ladies (read: lesbian orgy).
* the ending: yep, see, serial killer, but at least he'll have a cool sidekick along with him on his spree.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)