Degrassi "Who Do You Think You Are" Episode Discussion

learned:

* really, Show? a new episode on Halloween Night? at least make it a Halloween episode. no? *sigh*

* Ms. Oh,
  Oh Ms. Oh,
  where did you go?
  what was it like inside that Hole,
  that certain Black Hole?...

* "sure, the music video is cool...if you like porn...i mean, i do happen to like porn...but that's not the point..."

* Leo watch: well, you knew this was going to happen, everyone saw this coming a mile away. don't get me wrong, abuse will always be a relevant issue, but it's been done to death in these types of shows. i'm looking at it purely from an artistic perspective. art needs to be different to stand out, y'know? you've got to literally flip the script sometimes or things get stale quickly. if they won't show a healthy or recovered person on tv, how about delving into exactly what Leo's demons really are? why is he so angry? that would help to flesh out the character, to give him a soul, not in any way to excuse his behavior, but to not doom him to cardboard-bad-guy status forever.

* ---"um, i'm pregnant."
   ---"wait, can oral get you pregnant?"
   ---"i don't know."
   ---"can anal get you pregnant?"
   ---"i don't know. is that what we did?"
   ---"i don't know."
   ---"this is not good."
   ---"yep."

Saturday Night Live Edward Norton / Janelle Monae Episode Discussion

learned:

* you can be Method and do SNL, it's just...well, you're gonna be REALLY tired at the end of it.

* the thing is, PSL can stand for so many things...

* okay, this is a good development, more Nasim...even as a clueless cool kid...and a clueless cool virgin...i know, i know, but it's still more Nasim.

* Janelle Monae: while not my scene, i can appreciate this music. at least she's trying to be original, which is not the case with 99% of the bands out there. okay, 98%, i was being too high-and-mighty critic there. oh, and yes: best teeth ever.

* i don't need no books: porn taught me how to gyrate, son!

* most awesomely uncomfortable skit of the night: the slave freed 12 days ago. more of this, SNL, please, more substance, less fluff. you know it's good when the audience takes awkward pauses, not knowing if they should laugh.

* one Nerd, a booger, i ate my boogers like they were Nerds...when i was a kid...yeah, *looks up*, when i was a kid...

The Haunting Hour "Worry Dolls" Episode Discussion

learned:

* is it just me or is Katherine McNamara young in this? it's jarring because i just saw her recently on Kickin' It and other stuff looking, well, like her normal self. guess they filmed this two years ago or something and just got around to broadcasting it to the masses. no worries, though...

* slam dat door in the nanny's face! me? i would have loved to have a nanny when i was a kid growing up an only child. everyone needs a Mary Poppins to bounce his ideas off of, a reinforcement of the beauty of childlike wonderment and a promise to the impressionable youth that life still has a bit of magic in it...

* AM drama: urbandictionary term of the night

* again with the theme of a broken family. this time, the solution is so creepy that it's better just to leave things status-quo. everybody thinks their parents are weird, but what to do when your parents are really actually weird?

* those worry dolls were scary because they were simple. their "mouths" were but straight black lines: expressionless, robotic, zombie-like, only interested in carrying out their ancient duty, damn the consequences.

* i get it, the girl is worried that the worry dolls will come back, so they do. but according to the rules of this episode, i suppose she could continually burn them in the fireplace, worry about them, burn them, and so on. it's a vicious circle. the only way to break the cycle is to stop worrying that you will never break this cycle...

Degrassi "Everything You've Done Wrong" Episode Discussion

learned:

* if i had to list everything i've done wrong, i'd type forever...which might be a good thing...it'd keep me distracted from doing other things i'd have to then put on the list.

* the placebo effect doesn't work. i used to buy a whole mess of expensive weight-gain-powder canisters from GNC. i thought in my head all those shakes were truly adding muscle to my thin frame. they didn't. turns out it might as well have been regular chocolate-milk powder. whole thing was a waste of time and money.

* take it from me, anyone who's reading this: don't lie. don't start with a lie, start with the truth. Shakespeare was right, once you lie, you're doomed, because it's impossible to keep covering the initial lie up. you start to become proficient in lying. you start to lie about everything, even stupid stuff you should never lie about. you end up like me, blogging instead of going outside.

* i'm really liking Chewy as the comic relief, he's doing a great job in that role, the annoyingly oblivious act hasn't worn thin yet. although: talk to me after his requisite wearing of a Chewbacca costume in the Halloween episode to see where things stand...

* "i'm many things, Clare, but actress is not one of them." that line was so meta, it gave me chemo brain.

* i dunno, YOLO is a weak mantra for the post-millennials. it doesn't take reincarnation into account for one thing. also, we Gen-Xer '90s kids were much cooler in our plaid and our "oh well, whatever, nevermind."

* "i'm gonna do this ridiculous downward-dog thing until i can be confident enough to show my butt in the front row..."

Law & Order SVU "October Surprise" Episode Discussion

learned:

* for a split second, i thought that was Britney Spears.

* hey, at least it wasn't e-meth. it could have been, SNL and Law & Order are both NBC.

* "murder my vagina". speaking of, can't wait for the Amanda Bynes episode.

* even the most powerful man is putty in the hands of a sexy blonde cop.

* loyalty is good, but a little selfishness keeps you out of jail.

* sexting: it's all fun 'n' games 'til a head gets poked out...

The Haunting Hour "The Funhouse" Episode Discussion

learned:

* divorce/the broken family is a prevalent issue that runs throughout many of the episodes of this series, in every season. i've often wondered if this is what the writers are really trying to get at here, that monsters are monsters, but the real-life pain of divorce/separation is what haunts and scares kids the most.

* ---"wanna have some fun?"
---"what kind of fun are you talking about?"
*pause*
---"no, not that kind of fun..."

* dude, come on, enough with the tines of the fork screeching on the plate, it's worse than nails on a chalkboard. go tear up family photos again, or go do your drugs, i mean, go to the funhouse.

* "where have you been all night?"

it's so sad when the younger sister has to be the mother.

* no, no, that ending was limp, it's gotta have more punch to it. creepy dude running the funhouse just disappears, no questions asked? yeah, how did he know about family dinner night? sure, he could be the father himself disguised...but he also could be your standard stranger stalker. also, not all anger disfigures one's face. anger can be good and fruitful, it can fuel someone to action, to right a wrong, to stand up against injustice. i mean, Trent Reznor turned his rage into the most beautiful art of all time.

Degrassi "You Oughta Know" Episode Discussion

learned:

* did you know that "You Oughta Know" by Alanis is considered the first emo song?

* Winston, i feel ya, potato chips are the root of all evil. so, like Light, why don't you take this potato chip...and EAT IT!!!

* wait, when girls comment back to you, that doesn't mean they're in love with you? i really really really need to get off youtube and live a real life.

* long-distance relationships...just don't ever work out...especially on teen soap operas...

* swell?

Law & Order SVU "Wonderland Story" Episode Discussion

learned:

* those that looked weird smiling at the party for Munch: Cassidy, Cragen, Fin...Liv

though it was nice to see the team not dour and sour all the time for once.

* ---"can we have a man-to-man chat?"
---"sure."
---"you know, she's Czech, her blood runs hot..."
---"so you're racist as well as a rapist. you're a racist rapist."
---"chat was a bad idea."

* Fin already hates all of these people, and that one-liner is already a classic.

* "welcome to a wondrous underground world of enchantment. Alice In Wonderland is...

...wait, what? i had nothing to do with that. look, i'm just following orders, i do this because i'm bored out of my skull working all day at that deathly quiet library, i need some excitement in my drab life or i'll disappear. don't tell my mom, please? it's a big step-up for me to go from mom's basement to a water tower..."

* okay, if you'll indulge me for a minute: that last scene of Munch there at the end took me back to simpler times when i was at college. i was sitting in the middle of a mostly-abandoned auditorium in my drama class, just a few other students there who decided to wake up at 10AM, their voices pierced the hollow cavern of a classroom. as the teacher('s assistant) taught acting theory while putting her feet up on stage, i dreamed of when this class would end and i would have the rest of the night off to prepare for a special Homicide two-hour movie i couldn't wait to get to and watch. good times, good times. i treasure those good, comforting memories, those times when i didn't have a care in the world, when tv was my only concern, it helps to combat the sorrow when i think of where i am now...  

Saturday Night Live Bruce Willis / Katy Perry Episode Discussion

learned:

* is there a 5-Hour Energy for wannabe actors with their own youtube channel? asking for a "friend".

* boy dance party: finally, some signs of life tonight. i dance like that, but alone in my room. if i don't shake my junk, who will?

* Weekend Update: loved Cecily's making the McDuh arches sign with her fingers :)

* Weekend Update: okay, assuming that guy's tats are real and not painted on just for the skit, this was my favorite of the night. i can heartily relate, i've got some permanent ink that isn't bad, but wasn't quite how i'd envisioned them in my mind looking on my body. i was this close---"Closer"---to getting that NIN one...but hey, i'll always love Nine Inch Nails ;)

* Centauri Vodka: i mean, what? how?...why?...how did this get green-lit?...how did this make the final cut?...it was so bad, it was...bad.

* Katy Perry: she gave me a seizure...for two reasons.

The Haunting Hour "Detention" Episode Discussion

learned:

* yep, all the school tropes are present and accounted for at the start: queen bee, jock, outcast, and nerd...oh, and burnt-out teacher. are there well-rounded characters at a fictional school anymore? stay tuned...

* this is so true, this is something i've always thought: once you graduate, you still never leave high school. it's absolutely accurate, college and the real work-and-family world are simply bigger high-school models. all of your insecurities and habits in high school form an identity that hardens in those four years and remains with you the rest of your life, whether or not you think you're "not that person anymore". you never overcome the trauma of high school :(

* the Twilight Zone line is apt. at least they acknowledge the all-time master everyone copies from relentlessly with this type of show.

* speaking of, anyone reading this, check out The Outer Limits episode "Abduction"---the '90s series, not the '60s one. it's very similar with the high-school tropes and the sci-fi and such. "Abduction" was the first modern Outer Limits episode i watched and i was hooked on that series afterwards, i had to go back and watch every single episode, which i eventually did. you will, too, i promise, it's worth it.

* okay, so there is a little melting of tropes: the outcast likes the jock('s jokes), the jock really wants to be a comedian, the queen bee would rather be the outcast than carry the burden of her queen-sized pressure, and of course the nerd/teacher is a demon or angel or something. sweet ending. unfortunately, in real life, things mostly don't work out this well at school, that's what's really scary. real life is scarier than any show...



  

The Haunting Hour "Seance" Episode Discussion

i love this show, i really do. it takes me back to when shows were...well, good. it's a nostalgia arrow's path to shows like Goosebumps and Are You Afraid of the Dark?, back when characters were interesting, stories were well-plotted, and you just cared about tv, you couldn't wait to come home, sink your teeth into some pizza, and become immersed in a scare. plus, you got to see future Hollywood stars when they were young, before they were famous, that's always a treat. man, even the pizza tasted better during the '90s...

learned:

* okay, i normally side with the little guy, the one being persecuted, but that little sister is really, truly annoying at the start of this.

*  nothing good ever ever happens at a saw mill...

* it's not blood, it's  ketchup, but its rancid, expired ketchup, so...yeah, it was smart either way not to test it.

* that is some scary....................................................hair.

* hey, at least the guy with the axe has a sense of humor.

Degrassi "You Got Me" Episode Discussion

learned:

* oh, Degrassi, you got me, you got me, *clutches chest in over-the-top, over-dramatic death sequence*.

* whoa, Zig...i mean...he's a '50s street tough now.

* life is about two things: sex and death. for men, life is about one thing: sex. notice Drew's hallucination: sure, the hallucination is about the death of Adam, but really, Drew is mostly being affected by the person delivering that message: Clare, his forbidden fruit.

* side effects of sleeping pills: lost memory, oversleeping, and late-night cell-phone sexy stuff

* Leo check: still in check, flashes of anger, but mostly flashdancing

* the look of the dance, combined with all the film promos, got me in the mood to see Carrie again...the original classic, the good one.

Law & Order SVU "Internal Affairs" Episode Discussion

learned:

* Show, please don't turn this nice Liv/shrink connection they have going here into something tawdry down the line. don't have the shrink be secretly lusting after Liv or something...................the shrink is gonna be revealed as a creep, huh?

* i guess i'm in the minority here, but Mayhem's (Cassidy's) acting is just...off. i don't know if this is from the actor or the way the character is written, but i feel that he should go for it more. i just get the sense every time he's onscreen that he just doesn't believe in either himself or the character, he's holding back, not going for broke with his words or his actions, not feeling it, ya feel me? there's something artificial about the whole thing.

* sex is like pizza: even when it's bad or "just for work", it's still good.

* Nadia Dajani has an excuse for turning crazy: she was the ex-wife of Jon on Delocated.

* Liv talking to Nadia's character about married men ultimately not leaving their wives for their mistresses: see? i keep telling you, it all comes back to Stabler, he's like an eternal ghost in the room as this show churns ahead, you will never exorcise him despite his absence, his presence sticks to the walls.

* NO, MUNCH, NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday Night Live Miley Cyrus Episode Discussion

learned:

* oh, so that's where the whole tongue thing comes from, from Chuck E Cheese on her suit...or is it the other way around?

* poor Hannah Montana :(

* out of all the cast members that could have been in the naked "Wrecking Ball" skit...

* Miley as the musical guest: after the "big butts" lyric, i was like, okay, yeah, this is cool, i'm buyin' into this.

* Mornin' Miami: the best skit of the night for me, funny and just long enough without it becoming repetitive and tedious. which of course now means that this successful skit will be run into the ground Californians-style.

* the power of friendship > sex with Miley Cyrus