Power Rangers Super Ninja Steel "Making Waves"

learned:

* yeah it's what you say to a friend. come at me, bro. bro means brother

* Captain: i'm not the same Captain from that other blog. which soul in this godforsaken cove is brave enough to take on Bruiser? spoilers: Bruiser won't be a factor at all in this episode, Bruiser is a red herring, literally a red-herring fish.

* Vincent: catching fish is like catching ladies. bait.

* Hayley: hey dad! i have a dad?
Dad: not funny, kid.
Hayley: just kidding, pops, you know i love you when the script calls for it. but can we get back to the conversation? why are you black and i'm passing?
Dad: didn't we agree not to ruin the fishing weekend? we'll discuss this later at my grandson's baptism.
Hayley: about that......i'm not a Baptist anymore....i believe in Zordon now. can you blame me?

* Dad: i built this Russian drone. it's used primarily to fuck up elections all around the world.
Hayley: spoilers: it's really a Zord. i had to live with this man my whole life.

* Dad: well hello, white chocolate.
Sarah's mom: hello, tall dark and chocolate.
Hayley: ohhhhhh, now i understand why i'm passing.
Sarah: this is too weird, i can't take it..................it's not a racial thing.

* okay this is hilarious, i was thinking of making ribald comments of the two of them not knowing they would actually date! i thought they'd never go there on a kid's show. nice stepping up your game, Nick!
Chip Lynne: thank you.

* Sarah: mom, he's too big for you.
Mom: what?
Sarah: i mean his stature. in the cove community.

* Odius: dammit, writers, what are you doing to me!!? you're neutering me, which is impossible for a female. this is my time to shine!!! i can't have a malfunctioning RC control! from now on i'm magically transforming this pink pussy hat into my own Zord!

* Sarah: the main reason we need to break our parents up is i still want the opportunity to kiss you in the future.
Hayley: hey i'm all about dat sister love.

* Dad: open your mouth.
Mom opens her mouth.
Dad: come on, Chip, you know how this looks. from someone who looks like me?
Chip: sorry.
Mom: plus, i spit it out afterwards. that would never happen in real life.

* Mom: i'll spin you around on this child's jungle gym.
Chip: thanks, this is the first time we get to use that crazy whizzing-by camera angle. equipment is expensive.
Dad: i'm gonna throw up.
Mom: in my mouth, dear, i'll swallow as usual.

* Mick: i have a bright idea. let's everyone split up and solve the problem by ourself.
Hayley: not cool, Mick, you know i'll be the first one killed.
Mick: i solved it first! thus proving i'm the smartest one in the group. see? who needs teamwork? Einstein worked alone. genius is a solitary path. just do the show about me.
Chip: well that would save a lot of money. what are you thinking?
Mick: Neighbours but on stage, Mike-Tyson-one-man-show-style.

* Mom: you like Science?
Dad: SCIENCE FUCK YEAH

* Hayley and Sarah: we're sorry we sabotaged you two. clearly your love is destined.
Dad: not if this show takes place in South Africa.
Mom: it doesn't, right? yeah it's always in some vague southern part of the world.

* Sarah: that doesn't mean we have to see you fucking right here before us in front of our eyes on the garage floor.
Dad: i'm sorry you have to see your mom like this.
Mom: this is what tightening the screws looks like, dear.
Hayley: on the drone!

* Sarah: Chip, didn't like my wardrobe this week. the jean skirt COMPLETELY hid my ass.

* Preston: why do we always have location shots at this beach but we can never go swimming in the ocean?
Sarah: have you checked out my instagram ever?
Preston: unlike you, slut, i follow work rules.
Sarah: harsh.
Preston: sorry. my Olympic figure-skating dreams fell through.

* Brody: WHOA! Dad's drone turned into a Zord!
Dad: the Hunt for Red October.
Levi: i know, weren't you paying attention?
Calvin: who are you?
Russian Ranger: the Russian Ranger of course. everything now must have a Russian component. Rush 'N Attack.
Brody: for years i thought it was Russian Attack.

* Calvin: you two old people might have saved the world.
Mom: i know, our specific kind of love will conquer any hate thrown by world leaders.
Dad: i have to go now, leave this peaceful scene, i'm being rounded up.

* Mom and Dad: you know, you two, we may just be parents, but we're not dumb as rocks.
Sarah: why is everyone looking at me? i'm the blonde scientist, remember?

* wha? i seriously thought the show wasn't gonna show that neato Surfboard Zord. it was like five minutes left, don't scare me like that, script. that was the whole point.

* Vincent: IT WAS A HOAX! what do i win?
Captain: a year's supply of Gorton's fishsticks.
Monty: why are you wearing that distinguishing yellow raincoat, Captain Gorton?
Captain: i see how you two make eyes at each other. this is to protect me from your love flack. that ain't tartar sauce, kid.

* i admit. i honestly thought this episode was gonna be a dud. like it could have gone down in history as the top dudder, even with the Surf Zord. but i was pleasantly surprised with this parents story that came out of nowhere. no one was expecting this, like winning by 0.01 seconds. i mean this interracial step-fucking is the greatest Power Rangers subplot of all time.