The X-Files "My Struggle III"

learned:

* ah this show. oh this show which so sparks the space in my soul. i would wait for you forever for new episodes..............6!? 6!? that's it!?

* so it really wasn't a miniseries...it was two miniseries'es.

* the threequel of a film series rarely is the best movie in that film series. this is probably not the case here.

* Carl Gerhard Busch: Doctor Who's real name.

* can we all take a moment to recognize The X-Files wouldn't be the seminal series it is today without the Cigarette-Smoking Man. he is the greatest villain ever in fiction. he is The Last Sith.

* CSM is so smart about human nature and so hell-bent on destroying the world he would have been our greatest President...

* no Obama in that montage...what does it mean?...the Belluminati knows...

* something about that moon-landing scene. it seared into me. it will stay with me forever long after i stop reading science-fiction and just start reading the news. this revival was worth it if only for that scene.

* does anybody really consciously WANT to lie?

* let's bring on the clunky dialogue! you can tell Chris Carter is more of an idea-man than a writer. his writing may not be fluent but his concepts flow like alien wine. there is one thing Chris does love to write: CSM's macro-concept speeches. those speeches are filled with the wonder of a child who just picked up her first Asimov. i need to go surfing with this CC dude, get some cc's in me.

* Mulder: why do we keep having you as the doctor?
female Indian doctor: what the hell is that supposed to mean?
Mulder: sorry, i'm trying to act angry.

* Skinner: i'm a clone, aren't i? i mean i don't age at all. hey you see that pattern of blinking flashing lights in Dana's scan? she's saying FIND HIM in morse code.
Mulder: Skinner is a robot confirmed.
Skinner: nah i just like Kanye.

* Skinner: why are you mad at me all of a sudden?
Mulder: Chris really wants me to practice acting angry. a lot. hey have you noticed this show does a lot of its work in hospitals? i see more hospital shots here than i ever did on ER. this is also the show which has tallied the most number of fights, scuffles, and murder-attempts at hospitals.

* Scully: after 11 seasons, i finally believe.
Mulder: that we were never really in love?
Scully: in a red hair-dye that works.

* Chris: you got plastic surgery on your face?
Spender: are you asking Spender or me the actor?

* Spender: the 209? what does that mean, Chris?
Chris: it's a California thing, you wouldn't understand.

* Monica Reyes: i am simply not believable as the bad guy.
CSM: that makes you the perfect bad guy.

* Mulder: either this show would not exist without the sponsorship of Mustang, or we're doing the next Fast & Furious right before your eyes.

*  Mulder: where's my father!? i mean where's CSM!?
Syndicate: just missed them. we look just like them, don't we?
Mulder: not really.

* Syndicate: you should have seen CSM in his youth, he was all crazy and shit.
Mulder: he's mellowed in his old age. my father is the luckiest bastard who ever lived.
Syndicate: i mean even the little alien we had our secret cabal with was like, "chill out, CSM dude, that's bad for your blood pressure." the alien had no blood and was more of a pothead.
Mulder: got any of that pot on you right now?
Syndicate: it's legal now. pot has suddenly gotten extremely less-interesting.

* alien: okay, we'll take that crazy judge-lady on Fox News but we want Judge Judy back, we miss our queen.

* Mulder: you want to leave Earth? you want to colonize space? who are you working for!?
Syndicate: okay, you beat it out of us. Neil deGrasse Tyson.
Mulder: NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!!
Syndicate: okay, okay, Neil is actually Carl Sagan from a different angle. holograms, the universe is all holograms.

* Monica: what would you do on an annihilated Earth with no human life?
CSM: i've always wanted to see what would happen if i injected alien DNA into a T-rex.

* Skinner: what's that smell?
CSM: it's legal now. do you smoke? now?
Monica: this franchise is a stoner's dream.........................still not sure why i'm here...

* Scully: i left Shakespearean theatre in London for this? i had to relearn my American accent? this is like the third time i'm in mortal danger just this episode.
Agent Einstein: it's okay, i'm a bad driver, too. just like you.
Scully: *sigh*

* Einstein: Miller, what are we doing here?
Miller does not speak.
Monica: i know, right?

* Syndicate assassin: i wasn't trying to kill her. i was choking her. i thought she liked it rough.
Mulder scalpels him.
Mulder: you can't say those type of things anymore.

* Mulder: you smell like smoke.
 Skinner: it's legal now.
Mulder: you want to have our pissing contest? right here right now in this hospital?
Skinner: wait let me get the bedpans.

* Skinner: wait, YOU fucked Scully!?
CSM: i artificially fucked Scully, there's a difference. talk about a seminal series.

* Mulder: i knew i wasn't the father. i don't do romantic. it's just not in my DNA.
Skinner: you should listen to more Kendrick, Mulder.

* John McClane: boooooo. now we know what William looks like. mystery ruined.
Haley Joel Osment: i see dead people.
John McClane: so?