Power Rangers Super Ninja Steel "Prepare To Fail"

notes:

* or Prepare To Fall. Prepare To Autumn.

* it would have been much more narratively interesting to have Brax an ACTUAL monster who was afraid to fight...the whole way through...the entire episode. you could speak to ED and other men's fears, would have been powerful and after-school-special. that's where i thought the writers were going here for a large chunk for a while. i would have stood up and clapped. spoilers.

* Chip Lynne: we got a black and a Chinaman, we good? we covered, Nickelodeon?
Nickelodeon: more. calls for more. we got a black April on TMNT now. we are the Left and the Left's gonna take back the House this November. Linda Ellerbee's coming out of retirement to host the special.

* Badonna: this is MY episode! what are you doing, milady Madame Odius?
Odius: preparing for my big Halloween special!

* Badonna: hey Chinaman! mess with my fuck and you'll wish you were never born! i know your secret!
representative monster: my erectile dysfunction? it hurts to cum.
Badonna: no, that you're secretly a minority.

* Badonna: oh Brax! I have hearts in my eyes for you, you can't see them cos of the mask. you are so manly, so macho macho man, i love your long sword and hairy muscles.
Brax: i'm scared of my own shadow.
Badonna: i can work with that, Philip K Dick is my favorite author.

* teacher: school isn't THAT easy. that first test was a take-home test.
Sarah: i've got it all: brains, beauty, butt.

* Victor Vincent: wait, you failed the test, too, Monty? i thought you were a nerd! now we're really screwed! hey Monty, where'd you get all those beans? are you an illegal?
Monty: my mom's a beancounter. literally.
Victor: okay, it's a good plan, just don't leave all the empty bean cans in the trash can in front of the teacher's desk. it will be much more effective if we hide the evidence.

* Preston: SHIT

* fan: Levi, sign this shit!
Levi: i learned my lesson last episode so okay. character continuity.
Preston: hey, you look like my girlfriend.
fan: i'm not.
Preston: SHIT

* Rangers: Sarah, come on, we have to study for the mathematics test. you can watch a movie of running a train on you anytime.

* Brax: I'M SCARED OF FIGHTING! i thought i'd be the only one with a sword!

* Sarah: teach, i am so sorry but i cannot take this exam, i didn't study for it. in my defense, i had to roommate up with my mom who's going to college at age 40, it's this side-sitcom thing we're doing strictly as an exclusive Nick.com webseries.
teacher: we don't have a college in this country, everyone here stays in high school forever. what do you want to be when you grow up, Sarah?
Sarah: a model. but i'm too short.
teacher: life's hard, Sarah. look at me, i'm a model slash teacher.

* Brax: joke's on you! i'm just a good actor! a good actor on this show!

* Sarah: why are you here!?
Brax: adult swim dropped my show. and to capture you! Badonna weants to learn some moves from you.
Sarah: martial-arts moves?
Brax: bedroom moves. this pleases me.

* Cosmo: STOP PUSHING ALL THE BUTTONS, BADONNA! you'll cause World War III!!! i mean World War 4!

* Rangers: monster, i hope you're into BDSM cos we bout to WHIP yo ass!
Chip Lynne: that's a close one, have to check with S&P on that one, right back...

* teacher: okay class, here are your gas masks, pass them out. World War 4 is starting.
Sarah: teach, can we talk?
teacher: no, i'm busy. no make-up test, you're a failure in life.
Sarah: i promise i'll study this time. trains can wait. look at my mathematics book, it's all full of mini colorful neon-color papers in the margins.
teacher: that's called art. and nobody says mathematics.
Sarah: teacher, on the next test, may i copy off your paper?

* Monty: you know Victor, i think i found my calling! that's a pretty good door i put up!
Victor: you're gonna be a carpenter? go to trade school?
Monty: no, i'm gonna be Jesus.

* Badonna: btw, what was your big secret? spoilers.
Asian monster: coffee runs right through me.
Badonna: there's an app for that. our ship is stock full of Humira. that's the illegal drug this space ship smuggles to stay afloat. what's YOUR big secret, milady?
Madame Odius: it's a secret................that will be revealed at Halloween............the Power Rangers are BIG on Halloween.................hopefully it won't get dropped...........like Preston's girlfriend