Power Rangers Super Ninja Steel "Dimensions in Danger"

notes:

* SPOILERS: it's not really Tommy Oliver. or Antonio

* Dimensions In Danger: pretty weak title for such an occasion. jus' sayin'. how about "Sterling In Silver" to celebrate the Silver Anniversary?

* Preston: i'd like to formally put in my request to transfer to those Magic Rangers...

* Madame Odius: Badonna, you speak with a Puerto Rican accent. you a chica this whole time?
Badonna: yeah, what of it? as my Uncle Sal used to say on the stoop Rosie Perez rest his soul.
Odius: huh. makes sense. all you Bronx perverts.

* yeah, the Beast Morphers! i was calling them the Computer Rangers. change the name, change the game. and the toys. and the whole Grid thing introduced here will come into full peacock swing. Power Rangers finally has its own Beast series. Beast serieses are always the good serieses, take Transformers. please, my wife's a nag about fucking Optimus Prime. and Naruto...and Ninjago...

* Tommy on the phone: yeah, just came back from the dojo. saw Elvis there. what's for dinner, honey? hey JJ, i told you never to play with bikes!
JJ: sorry, dad.
Tommy: where are you, son?
JJ: don't come in my room, dad!

* Drayven: i'm new but i look old.

* Director Chip Lynne: just stand there and shut up, Tommy, and look cute and mean.

* Mick Kanic: stop playing pool, you little fuckers. time to get serious.
Preston: wait, my new girlfriend's about to bank me in.
Mick: fuck your little waifu.
cloaked monks reenter.
Brody: who are you?
monks: we are professional pool players. ready to work?

* "hi, i'm the girl you don't know"

* Caveman Ranger: i'm Yoshi. you haven't seen much of me since cos i've been hibernating.......it is kinda strange how i didn't become a breakout star.....i'm the perfect Japanese specimen...........why the hell wasn't i in the rich Asian movie?

* Calvin: oh yeah, Reefside, that's where Saved by the Bell took place and where i surf.

* Badonna: hey, it's Antonio from the block!

* Tommy: okay, which one is the Ranger who never grew up and remained a kid his whole life? and which one is the Killer Ranger in jail?

* y'know i'd wish Ciara Hanna well on instagram but i'm pretty sure she hates my guts.

* Emma: why does SHE get to do this? i was CLEARLY the prettier one on the show! i was better-looking and had that exotic appeal.
Gia: didn't you say you wanted to disassociate yourself completely from the Power Rangers world to focus on your artistic nudes?

* Andrew Gray: so i continue going to cons.....saying my spiel....i wasn't a bad actor i just lacked direction...........everyone in their Troy cosplay keeps going out of their way to blame me for having the Anniversary on my crappy season and ruining it..............my life would have been a whole lot different if i had married Ciara Hanna like i thought i was gonna...

* Gia: the last thing i remember, i was talking to Tommy, my husband.
Tommy: ex, dear, ex. remember who i'm with now?
Gia: he's just confused. how the hell did you get custody?

* Tommy Robot: how is it that every Power Rangers season eventually ends up becoming about Tommy Oliver?
Real Tommy: i can say "butt"? oh yeah, it's 8PM, i can say "butt" on Nickelodeon!

* Tommy: guys, i'm good now (like that last storyline i was in) but we might want to leave this bridge. i'm not sure if i set it to blow or not.

* Wes: Tommy, how do you fight so well? can you sensei me?
Tommy: i've followed one guiding principle throughout my life on- and off-set. i have a tattoo of it on my forearm: Jesus didn't tap. and i never did any of the porns you guys did.
Wes: i get it, so like the Circle Game, right?
Caveman Yoshi: who's Jesus?
Redbot: coincidentally my bartender's name is Jesus.

* Catherine: i played Katherine. if anyone should marry Tommy on the rebound, i get him! i get those tattoos! i have seniority! i earned it! Gia was on the worst season!

* Brody: what are you doing, Sarah? why are you using pink rope to tie me up? please tell me this isn't a dream! you know what the B in Brody stands for? BDSM.
Sarah: know what the S stands for?

* Tommy: now if y'all excuse me, i gotta get back home. dinner's getting cold.
*jeeps it*
Jason Lee Scott opens the porch frontdoor and kisses Tommy on the mouth. they embrace.
Tommy: son, get out here into the sunlight so your fathers can get a good look atchoo.
JJ: dad, i don't wanna. i want to stay in the house and not show my face. i don't want to show my face at school, either. i don't wanna go to school. can you homeschool me?