Justice League Action "Luthor in Paradise"

learned:

* quick question before we start: where would comics be without Greek mythology?

* did it live up to the hype? does anything besides LeBron James?

* amazon: thank you.
Hippolyta: for what?

* Lex Luthor: i am the man.
amazon: Diana warned us about this man. one-minute man.
Lex: no, wha, no, that's not true! i have a reputation with the ladies to uphold! i'll sue you for libel!
amazon: too late, the review of you is already up. on Amazon.

* Hippolyta: be gone from Themyscira!
Lex: you need mascara, honey.
Hippolyta: i went on a date with you, Lex, remember? my bad review of you has been added to your Amazon profile.

* Hippolyta: Circe, why are you working with this loathsome man?
Circe: i like bald guys.
Hippolyta: but...i mean...wait...look at this picture of Lupita Nyong'o? isn't she sexy?

* Lex: why do you really love me?
Circe: my name means pig. you're a pig. together we're bacon.

* Wonder Woman: Circe, get me out of this stone hand! i do not like being fisted!
Batman: should i take this one or...?
Superman: i think i better take this one...

* Hippolyta: you need my staff. your staffs are small.
Batman: tell me about it. it's just Alfred.

* Superman: what's the Fallen Realm?
Wonder Woman: google it with your oculus.
Superman: what's the Oculus of the Argo?
Wonder Woman: a thing you use to have virtual naked sex with Taylor Swift.

* Batman: Olympian Gods? i was home-schooled.

* Hippolyta: i am ashamed. Hera herself entrusted me with Zeus's power.
Superman: why didn't Zeus just give you His power Himself?
Hippolyta: they're in the middle of a messy divorce. it's Kramer vs. Kramer vs. Krypton.

* Wonder Woman: all men are untrustworthy.
come on, writers, don't clean it up cos it's a kid's show. the real world is brutal out there.

* Batman: slow down! i don't have any powers and i'm jumping over things like Mario upside-down! someone take care of this flying monster for me!
Wonder Woman: man you whine too much. that's why i dumped you.

* Lex: okay so the main thing about this circle thingy is that it's giving me hair! i look literally like Michelangelo's God!
Circe: the turtle? *shoots*
Lex: why are you shooting at me?
Circe: like i said, i like bald guys.

* Circe: i don't see a problem here. i'm growing trees. i'm good for the environment.

* Wonder Woman: the Lasso of Truth is around you. what do you really think of Circe?
Lex: please! i can't afford another bad review!

* Hippolyta: so despite all the female empowerment the men save the day? can we get some female writers? i'm not validating your parking. get these damn drones outta ma face!

* Hippolyta: you are banished! to Tartarus with you!
Circe: i'll go willingly if you promise never to smile again. i can see your tartar. queenie you need to brush yo teeth! you might need no man but you need toothpaste!