The Haunting Hour "Goodwill Toward Men" Episode Discussion

learned:

* Joey King: okay, here we go, this is my chance, this is my episode, my stage to shine, holiday special, it's all set up, the story is a cliche switch but i can make it work.
Joey King after the episode: too bad the pacing was disjointed, the angel of death's general presence was awkward, and the gardener's boy didn't seem as interested in me as you'd think. needs more Twilight.

* gardener: my fucking back!
gardener's son: you okay, pop?
gardener: no, but all i can do is pop some pills. you have to learn that this world is cruel, son. all we have is each other, the rich snobs we work for will never help us, they consider us garbage.
son: but we take out the garbage.
gardener: that's not the point. hey, you have any more of those magic white pills from earlier? they fixed me right up real good.
son: the VANQUISH? yeah i know. here you go.
gardener: good but must have more.
son: sorry, all out, i stole them from the rich family we work for.
gardener: good on ya, son, you're learning...but dammit.

* daughter: i invited the gardener's son to have some cookies.
mother: you invited that tramp of a boy to eat your cookie?
daughter: what's the big deal, i let him through the back door.
father: you let that scamp into your back door?
daughter: i'm gonna date him.
brother: what's next, crazy cuckoo bird, are you gonna date that lower-class from-the-wrong-side-of-the-tracks bad boy? dammit.

* brother: why is this happening to us?
daughter: cos you have a punchable face.

* daughter: why are you doing this to us? we're not bad people, just rich.
angel: have you heard of affluenza?
daughter: you're speaking to me? cool cool. um, no. is it like the flu?
angel: it's worse. your family isn't bad, they're sick, and i am here to cure them.
daughter: cool cool. so can i look up affluenza on the internet somewhere? for research?
angel: nice try, kid, but your ipad is mine now. i had to put the family filter on it before i could search for my cat videos.

* final scene:
daughter: so it turns out i was in the wrong family.
new brother: you were my love interest before, right? i knew there was a reason i wasn't quite into you despite you being hot.
daughter: makes sense.
new brother: also, i'm gay.
daughter: cool cool. and now my wretched brother and clueless father are the gardeners.
new brother: no offense, but your mom was a bitch.
daughter: no, she was just sick. she still has resting bitch face, though.
gardener brother: hello, former sister, merry Christmas.
daughter: merry Christmas.
the daughter punches her ex-brother, the new gardener's son, in the nose.
gardener brother: what was that for?!
daughter: you may have turned over a new leaf, gardener pun, but you still have a punchable face.