learned:
* Claude doesn't sound drunk, he sounds like someone sounding drunk.
* Satan can't hold his liquor? that explains the Catholic Mass so much. all that altar wine in the backroom is the Last Stand.
* i feel so sorry for that spider. on the other hand, it was a fun workplace for him.
* even Spielberg listens to his actors. except that one time when Tom Hanks wanted his character in Saving Private Ryan to be Forrest Gump running through history.
* you'd think the tripping-out place would be arctic in a snowstorm, not a hot beach. you can still have the babes, but they'd be snowboarding hot-cocoa-sippin' snow bunnies. okay, cold cocoa.
NOTES FROM MY NETHER / only the finest programs of television / your host this evening is early and wears no robe, 83optics on youtube but you know him better as THE LATE PHOENIX / come and mull over the monastery mulled wine, see what's on / N O T E S
Monday, September 28, 2015
Vicious "Wedding" Episode Discussion
learned:
* Violet: Ash, i have a confession to make. that previous confession when i said we didn't do anything together in that bed was a lie, we did in fact fuck.
Ash: i'm so confused.
Violet: i know, that's what i love about you, dahlin. i'm telling you this cos my husband is back in town and he's a very jealous man. i have a confession to make: i hate him. he's cruel and horrible. i wouldn't bat an eye if he just sort of, y'know, "disappeared".
Ash: i can't do that, Violet, we gotta have at least one member of my family stay out of prison.
Violet: well now, Ash, you're clever after all.
* Mason and Penelope go to pick up the cake.
young woman at counter: i....don't...know....anything.
Mason: do you know how much i hate you?
young woman at counter: thanks, dad.
* Ash: OMG i think Stuart's mum died right in my arms!
Violet: so this is Weekend at Bernie's?
Freddie: yes, but British Bernie, dignified.
* Freddie: why are you here?!
Mason: well i am your brother.
Freddie: really? good job, show, keeping that secret until now. what other secret relationships do you have?
Mason: Penelope's my mistress, i am one of Violet's ex-husbands, Stuart is my butler, the real Balthazar is at my flat and healthy, and Ash is my son.
Freddie (shakes Mason's hand): glad to see you're out of prison, my man. what's your name again?
* Stuart cries at the phone thinking about his mother. Freddie comforts him.
Freddie: there, there, i love you. these are real tears, right?
Stuart (continues crying awkwardly): of course, i'm Method like you.
* i will not Breathe
until Season Three...
* Violet: Ash, i have a confession to make. that previous confession when i said we didn't do anything together in that bed was a lie, we did in fact fuck.
Ash: i'm so confused.
Violet: i know, that's what i love about you, dahlin. i'm telling you this cos my husband is back in town and he's a very jealous man. i have a confession to make: i hate him. he's cruel and horrible. i wouldn't bat an eye if he just sort of, y'know, "disappeared".
Ash: i can't do that, Violet, we gotta have at least one member of my family stay out of prison.
Violet: well now, Ash, you're clever after all.
* Mason and Penelope go to pick up the cake.
young woman at counter: i....don't...know....anything.
Mason: do you know how much i hate you?
young woman at counter: thanks, dad.
* Ash: OMG i think Stuart's mum died right in my arms!
Violet: so this is Weekend at Bernie's?
Freddie: yes, but British Bernie, dignified.
* Freddie: why are you here?!
Mason: well i am your brother.
Freddie: really? good job, show, keeping that secret until now. what other secret relationships do you have?
Mason: Penelope's my mistress, i am one of Violet's ex-husbands, Stuart is my butler, the real Balthazar is at my flat and healthy, and Ash is my son.
Freddie (shakes Mason's hand): glad to see you're out of prison, my man. what's your name again?
* Stuart cries at the phone thinking about his mother. Freddie comforts him.
Freddie: there, there, i love you. these are real tears, right?
Stuart (continues crying awkwardly): of course, i'm Method like you.
* i will not Breathe
until Season Three...
Doctor Who "The Witch's Familiar" Episode Discussion
learned:
* Missy (sharpening stick) i'm gonna eat you..................oh, wasn't trying to make that sound as cheeky as it did.
Clara: there's no going back now, we're OTP.
* Clara: what's up with these sewers?
Missy: they're decomposed Daleks.
Clara: no wonder they're angry all the time. it's a gift to be able to die.
Missy: i'm glad you think that way (sharpening stick).
* Davros: you have the power to commit genocide, how does it feel to be a god?
the Doctor: come on, man, that's not what God is about, at least that shouldn't be the first thing you think of when you think of God. can we take a break from all the negativity? at least for this week that the Pope is here?
* the Doctor spins around in an half-cut-open Dalek casing.
the Doctor: WHEEEEEEEEEEEE
Missy: that's my line. why are you having so much fun with this? it's the Daleks' worst nightmare, right?
the Doctor: no, i never got to ride the bumper cars when i was a kid. i don't remember being a child actually, it's like i started as an old man.
* Clara: what's the Dalek word for love?
Missy: exterminate.
Clara: how about hate?
Missy: exterminate.
Clara: how about exterminate?
Missy: Moffat's critics. Steven has had it and programmed that into the Daleks himself when Davros was sleeping.
* Davros: let me see with my own eyes.
the Doctor: i'm crying. i'll help you. you can now cry through your eyes.
Davros: i tricked you! i hate the sun, my skin burns easily as you can imagine. now all of my Dalek children are half-Dalek, half-Time Lord, they're Dalek Deities!
Missy: excuse me, i'm a Time Lady.
Davros: no one asked you, Bitch's Familiar............sorry, that last comment was out of line, i had a rough childhood.
the Doctor: AH-HA! i tricked YOU, Davros! Doctors don't cry, we'd never be able to do our job, we have to make calculating, emotionless decisions that affect whole worlds. also, i hate the sun, too. i got rid of a star once with one wave of my sonic screwdriver/shades.
Missy: that's cold....literally.
Davros: i like you. wanna fuck?
Missy: sorry, dear, i'm taken apparently.
Sarff: Master, i...
Missy: yes?
Sarff: not you! my master, Davros.
Davros: what do you want you Harry Potter reject?
* child Davros: please help me! you said you would! you promised! you said i had a chance!
the Doctor: okay i'll only help you if we NEVER EVER see this flashback of you as a boy on the planet's scarred surface with the smoke again! what is this, the fifth, sixth time we've seen this? i've unintentionally memorized this scene.
* Missy (sharpening stick) i'm gonna eat you..................oh, wasn't trying to make that sound as cheeky as it did.
Clara: there's no going back now, we're OTP.
* Clara: what's up with these sewers?
Missy: they're decomposed Daleks.
Clara: no wonder they're angry all the time. it's a gift to be able to die.
Missy: i'm glad you think that way (sharpening stick).
* Davros: you have the power to commit genocide, how does it feel to be a god?
the Doctor: come on, man, that's not what God is about, at least that shouldn't be the first thing you think of when you think of God. can we take a break from all the negativity? at least for this week that the Pope is here?
* the Doctor spins around in an half-cut-open Dalek casing.
the Doctor: WHEEEEEEEEEEEE
Missy: that's my line. why are you having so much fun with this? it's the Daleks' worst nightmare, right?
the Doctor: no, i never got to ride the bumper cars when i was a kid. i don't remember being a child actually, it's like i started as an old man.
* Clara: what's the Dalek word for love?
Missy: exterminate.
Clara: how about hate?
Missy: exterminate.
Clara: how about exterminate?
Missy: Moffat's critics. Steven has had it and programmed that into the Daleks himself when Davros was sleeping.
* Davros: let me see with my own eyes.
the Doctor: i'm crying. i'll help you. you can now cry through your eyes.
Davros: i tricked you! i hate the sun, my skin burns easily as you can imagine. now all of my Dalek children are half-Dalek, half-Time Lord, they're Dalek Deities!
Missy: excuse me, i'm a Time Lady.
Davros: no one asked you, Bitch's Familiar............sorry, that last comment was out of line, i had a rough childhood.
the Doctor: AH-HA! i tricked YOU, Davros! Doctors don't cry, we'd never be able to do our job, we have to make calculating, emotionless decisions that affect whole worlds. also, i hate the sun, too. i got rid of a star once with one wave of my sonic screwdriver/shades.
Missy: that's cold....literally.
Davros: i like you. wanna fuck?
Missy: sorry, dear, i'm taken apparently.
Sarff: Master, i...
Missy: yes?
Sarff: not you! my master, Davros.
Davros: what do you want you Harry Potter reject?
* child Davros: please help me! you said you would! you promised! you said i had a chance!
the Doctor: okay i'll only help you if we NEVER EVER see this flashback of you as a boy on the planet's scarred surface with the smoke again! what is this, the fifth, sixth time we've seen this? i've unintentionally memorized this scene.
Monday, September 21, 2015
Your Pretty Face Is Going To Hell "National Lampoon's Fireballz" Episode Discussion
learned:
* ladybutt!
* in order to get to the naked women you must lose your penis? I'd still do it cos I want a relationship.
* this episode ruined my desire to be in a video game.
* the greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was making man believe the password wasn't 666 cos that'd be too obvious...
* the shedevil in charge of the women is my favorite Squidbilly! know that voice anywhere.
* Chicken Hell aka KFC. I have such a riddled relationship with KFC, I know what they're doing to those poor chickens but at the same time that food is delicious and savory. I'm going to Hell, huh?
Doctor Who "The Magician's Apprentice" Episode Discussion
learned:
* i've always wanted to do this.
* child Davros: there are loads of hand mines everywhere! i can't get out! btw, hand mines, i get it.
the Doctor: well just don't stand there, these people buried underground urgently need your assistance!
* Davros's servant (gliding everywhere): don't mind me, i have rollerblades underneath my robe.
* Kate Stewart: it's the most horrible thing! all the planes are frozen.
Clara: a delay at the airports? wow. well i've been with the Doctor enough to know there's a first time for everything.
* Missy: your boyfriend's still dead?
Clara: that's just cruel.
Missy: no, i just want to know if you're available. i want to fuck you.
the global energy from the collective cumming of all the fanfic writers around the world causes the planes to start moving again.
* as the doctor shreds his electric guitar, the crowd flick on their lighters and cheer.
crowd: hey dude, play "Freebird"!
the Doctor: but i haven't taught you the word "dude" yet.
crowd: yes you have, you've come here before on that weirdass blue phone, remember?
the Doctor: no i really don't. i'm getting too old for this shit.
* Missy leaves the room where she and Clara are captured and walks on water into space...and eventually she meets Mordecai and Rigby in Purple Space.
* Clara: you and the Doctor are friends?
Missy: of course.
Clara: but you fight all the time.
Missy: exactly.
Clara: so then you're more like brothers.
Missy: sisters.
* a Dalek approaches the Doctor with gunstick out.
Dalek: PARTICIPATE!!!
the Doctor: what?
Dalek: hi, i'm the tennis-ball shooter from that episode of Total Drama Ridonculous Race, nice to meet you.
the Doctor: hello. do i shake your gunstick or what?
* Davros: if you could kill Hitler as a child, would you?
the Doctor: i've thought eons about this and my answer now is yes, i should have killed you as a boy.
Davros: no man, not me, Hitler, Hitler, this is a hypothetical! what is wrong with you, man?!
* Davros: i needed to created the Daleks to counter your sappy goodness.
the Doctor: you have destroyed so much life in the universe, and for what?
Davros: cos without the Daleks there is no show. i mean you think people will tune in each week to watch an old fart tinkering in his state-of-the-art lab on Gallifrey for an hour?
* i've always wanted to do this.
* child Davros: there are loads of hand mines everywhere! i can't get out! btw, hand mines, i get it.
the Doctor: well just don't stand there, these people buried underground urgently need your assistance!
* Davros's servant (gliding everywhere): don't mind me, i have rollerblades underneath my robe.
* Kate Stewart: it's the most horrible thing! all the planes are frozen.
Clara: a delay at the airports? wow. well i've been with the Doctor enough to know there's a first time for everything.
* Missy: your boyfriend's still dead?
Clara: that's just cruel.
Missy: no, i just want to know if you're available. i want to fuck you.
the global energy from the collective cumming of all the fanfic writers around the world causes the planes to start moving again.
* as the doctor shreds his electric guitar, the crowd flick on their lighters and cheer.
crowd: hey dude, play "Freebird"!
the Doctor: but i haven't taught you the word "dude" yet.
crowd: yes you have, you've come here before on that weirdass blue phone, remember?
the Doctor: no i really don't. i'm getting too old for this shit.
* Missy leaves the room where she and Clara are captured and walks on water into space...and eventually she meets Mordecai and Rigby in Purple Space.
* Clara: you and the Doctor are friends?
Missy: of course.
Clara: but you fight all the time.
Missy: exactly.
Clara: so then you're more like brothers.
Missy: sisters.
* a Dalek approaches the Doctor with gunstick out.
Dalek: PARTICIPATE!!!
the Doctor: what?
Dalek: hi, i'm the tennis-ball shooter from that episode of Total Drama Ridonculous Race, nice to meet you.
the Doctor: hello. do i shake your gunstick or what?
* Davros: if you could kill Hitler as a child, would you?
the Doctor: i've thought eons about this and my answer now is yes, i should have killed you as a boy.
Davros: no man, not me, Hitler, Hitler, this is a hypothetical! what is wrong with you, man?!
* Davros: i needed to created the Daleks to counter your sappy goodness.
the Doctor: you have destroyed so much life in the universe, and for what?
Davros: cos without the Daleks there is no show. i mean you think people will tune in each week to watch an old fart tinkering in his state-of-the-art lab on Gallifrey for an hour?
Monday, August 3, 2015
Degrassi "Don't Look Back" Movie Discussion
learned:
* ahem, FILM discussion
* Baywatch tribute.
Maya, Tiny, Zig, Gloria: what's that?
writer: never mind, continue.
lifeguard: you fail this course like you fail at life, Maya. Gloria coulda had a spine injury.
Maya: i thought her huge tits would offset her back.
* Gloria: hello everyone online! i'm internet famous! i somehow have a billion people all over the world watching my popsicle videos yet no one in the world has ever heard of me.
* Tristan: what are you doing? science is stupid. you are stupid.
Zoe: so friends are more important than school?
Tristan: Skins, hello!
* creepy teacher in car: hello, little girl, can i be your new daddy?
Frankie: i would but my heel broke, wasn't expecting that, threw off my entire day. who are you?
creepy teacher in car: i teach at that dump Degrassi Community School. my name is Mr. Redherring.
* wait, too much cola rots your kidneys? i am SO FUCKED. no, seriously.
* Tristan: girls are disappearing. what do you think it is?
Hunter: i've been researching this online, that's what i've been doing online. supposedly there's this very virulent black hole located in this area...
* music mom: i have your resume here and under weaknesses you list eczema...
* Zoe: so teach, like what you see?
creepy teacher: take off ALL your clothes.
Zoe: PERV!
creepy teacher: no, i'm an asexual nudist. honey, i've been making people laugh on tv since before you were a gleam in your stage mom's eye.
* Frankie throws up all over the nice carpet.
Frankie: mom, don't me mad, that's not real throw up, it's fake, we're on the set of a tv show.
* other female intern: look, just be careful. on my first date with Logan, he put his curled pinky finger to his mouth and asked me for a million dollars. i thought he was just quoting the movie line but he was serious.
* Logan (curled pinky finger to mouth): can i borrow one meallion dollars?
Frankie: what for?
Logan: special shampoo for this hot mess of a frizzy moptop i call my hair.
* Zoe: why does the creepy teacher have missing-girl case files?
Grace: ridiculously avid fan of that Case Closed anime.
* Zig: we're all zombies tho, zombies and ghosts in this anonymous hate-filled internet age...
Maya: i didn't catch that, say it again but this time with your shirt off?
* Logan: who was the first person to portray the Joker on tv?
Winston: Neil Armstrong?
* Maya: wow okay here goes: you're a bitch, your kids are bitches, and your music sucks ass. sowry but you did say i only had one minute.
music mom: i appreciate your honesty. you're fired. before the door hits you on the way out, did you happen to catch Real Housewives last night?
Maya: no but your daughter watches it religiously. don't you have parental controls on the tv?
music mom: sure do. my daughter is NOT allowed to see that derivative Spongebob junk. that show peaked in Season 1.
* Miles: so are you two up for a threesome? i don't believe Degrassi has ever gone there before.
Zoe: gotta wait till we're unrated over at Netflix.
Grace: fine but i can come as i please...
Jack: i changed my mind! i wanna come back!
* Zig: have you seen Maya?
Zoe: no, have you?
Zig: no.
Zoe: are you still writing Zoemund fanfic and posting it online to spite the writers?
Zig: yes. you?
Zoe: yes.
* Grace: i know what will save this show! scienc-
Zoe: sex!
* Maya: why did you do this?! what was the point of this whole thing?!
Logan: that's the thing with red herrings, they're always more interesting than the actual herring.
* Gracevas kiss.
Grace: so you're gay now?
Zoe: my name is Zoe Rivas and i am bisexual. i'm a strong independent woman. i will not let any form of media nullify me.
* Frankie: so what are your plans for the future?
Winston (movie guy voice): this December, prepare yourself for something epic. starring the stars. nostalgia will overload and blow up like the Death Star. and the final proof will be proven: Han did in fact shoot first.
Winston "Chewbacca" Chu departs, riding the sunset on the Millennium Falcon.
* Lola eats Maya in her taco costume.
* ............................................................................we'll see.....................
* ahem, FILM discussion
* Baywatch tribute.
Maya, Tiny, Zig, Gloria: what's that?
writer: never mind, continue.
lifeguard: you fail this course like you fail at life, Maya. Gloria coulda had a spine injury.
Maya: i thought her huge tits would offset her back.
* Gloria: hello everyone online! i'm internet famous! i somehow have a billion people all over the world watching my popsicle videos yet no one in the world has ever heard of me.
* Tristan: what are you doing? science is stupid. you are stupid.
Zoe: so friends are more important than school?
Tristan: Skins, hello!
* creepy teacher in car: hello, little girl, can i be your new daddy?
Frankie: i would but my heel broke, wasn't expecting that, threw off my entire day. who are you?
creepy teacher in car: i teach at that dump Degrassi Community School. my name is Mr. Redherring.
* wait, too much cola rots your kidneys? i am SO FUCKED. no, seriously.
* Tristan: girls are disappearing. what do you think it is?
Hunter: i've been researching this online, that's what i've been doing online. supposedly there's this very virulent black hole located in this area...
* music mom: i have your resume here and under weaknesses you list eczema...
* Zoe: so teach, like what you see?
creepy teacher: take off ALL your clothes.
Zoe: PERV!
creepy teacher: no, i'm an asexual nudist. honey, i've been making people laugh on tv since before you were a gleam in your stage mom's eye.
* Frankie throws up all over the nice carpet.
Frankie: mom, don't me mad, that's not real throw up, it's fake, we're on the set of a tv show.
* other female intern: look, just be careful. on my first date with Logan, he put his curled pinky finger to his mouth and asked me for a million dollars. i thought he was just quoting the movie line but he was serious.
* Logan (curled pinky finger to mouth): can i borrow one meallion dollars?
Frankie: what for?
Logan: special shampoo for this hot mess of a frizzy moptop i call my hair.
* Zoe: why does the creepy teacher have missing-girl case files?
Grace: ridiculously avid fan of that Case Closed anime.
* Zig: we're all zombies tho, zombies and ghosts in this anonymous hate-filled internet age...
Maya: i didn't catch that, say it again but this time with your shirt off?
* Logan: who was the first person to portray the Joker on tv?
Winston: Neil Armstrong?
* Maya: wow okay here goes: you're a bitch, your kids are bitches, and your music sucks ass. sowry but you did say i only had one minute.
music mom: i appreciate your honesty. you're fired. before the door hits you on the way out, did you happen to catch Real Housewives last night?
Maya: no but your daughter watches it religiously. don't you have parental controls on the tv?
music mom: sure do. my daughter is NOT allowed to see that derivative Spongebob junk. that show peaked in Season 1.
* Miles: so are you two up for a threesome? i don't believe Degrassi has ever gone there before.
Zoe: gotta wait till we're unrated over at Netflix.
Grace: fine but i can come as i please...
Jack: i changed my mind! i wanna come back!
* Zig: have you seen Maya?
Zoe: no, have you?
Zig: no.
Zoe: are you still writing Zoemund fanfic and posting it online to spite the writers?
Zig: yes. you?
Zoe: yes.
* Grace: i know what will save this show! scienc-
Zoe: sex!
* Maya: why did you do this?! what was the point of this whole thing?!
Logan: that's the thing with red herrings, they're always more interesting than the actual herring.
* Gracevas kiss.
Grace: so you're gay now?
Zoe: my name is Zoe Rivas and i am bisexual. i'm a strong independent woman. i will not let any form of media nullify me.
* Frankie: so what are your plans for the future?
Winston (movie guy voice): this December, prepare yourself for something epic. starring the stars. nostalgia will overload and blow up like the Death Star. and the final proof will be proven: Han did in fact shoot first.
Winston "Chewbacca" Chu departs, riding the sunset on the Millennium Falcon.
* Lola eats Maya in her taco costume.
* ............................................................................we'll see.....................
Friday, July 31, 2015
Degrassi "Finally" Episode Discussion
learned:
* finally it sorta ends.
* Alli (reading): "Backwoods Bhandari is a slut. Jenna got knocked up and is never around. Connor's some weird kid nobody knows how to talk to. Simpson secretly wants to get with me, we both imagined it. and don't get me started on Eli, i'm deathly afraid of goths, they're like clowns to me. parents just don't understand and my sister went missing years ago without a trace."
Clare (takes her book back): that's why you don't read diaries.
* Miles (jumps in the pool): that's one small step for rich boy, one giant leap for ruining Zoemund.
Winston: Lance Armstrong, right?
Arlene: haha you dumb.
* Drew: will you go to prom with me?
Becky: nice promposal. it's a yes for now but fair warning i just inhaled a massive cloud of pot smoke.
* Becky: OMG here we are! we're the best of friends! i'm so excited!
Imogen: why was i here this whole time? why didn't i run away with Fiona? why didn't they make cool 3-minute webisodes of Fimogen fucking in Paris?
Becky: there's always Jack.
Imogen: who's Jack?
* Dallas: so i kinda screwed up the years, but next year's prom is gonna be bomb.
Alli: but you're MY dumb jock.
* Hunter: i challenge you to a duel.
Miles: so that's why you've been glued to your screen, you were looking up martial arts.
Hunter: mostly cartoon porn but a little martial arts, too.
* Mama Torres: son, i know my milf powers are irresistible and i make a mean manwich, but this is pathetic. you need to get out more, join a club or something.
Drew: i have joined a club, mom, but i can't talk about it.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
* Connor: these priest burgers taste like ass.
Becky: love 'em.
* Alli (reading): "Backwoods Bhandari is a slut. Jenna got knocked up and is never around. Connor's some weird kid nobody knows how to talk to. Simpson secretly wants to get with me, we both imagined it. and don't get me started on Eli, i'm deathly afraid of goths, they're like clowns to me. parents just don't understand and my sister went missing years ago without a trace."
Clare (takes her book back): that's why you don't read diaries.
* Miles (jumps in the pool): that's one small step for rich boy, one giant leap for ruining Zoemund.
Winston: Lance Armstrong, right?
Arlene: haha you dumb.
* Drew: will you go to prom with me?
Becky: nice promposal. it's a yes for now but fair warning i just inhaled a massive cloud of pot smoke.
* Becky: OMG here we are! we're the best of friends! i'm so excited!
Imogen: why was i here this whole time? why didn't i run away with Fiona? why didn't they make cool 3-minute webisodes of Fimogen fucking in Paris?
Becky: there's always Jack.
Imogen: who's Jack?
* Dallas: so i kinda screwed up the years, but next year's prom is gonna be bomb.
Alli: but you're MY dumb jock.
* Hunter: i challenge you to a duel.
Miles: so that's why you've been glued to your screen, you were looking up martial arts.
Hunter: mostly cartoon porn but a little martial arts, too.
* Mama Torres: son, i know my milf powers are irresistible and i make a mean manwich, but this is pathetic. you need to get out more, join a club or something.
Drew: i have joined a club, mom, but i can't talk about it.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
* Connor: these priest burgers taste like ass.
Becky: love 'em.
* Jack: yeah i don't do novelty dances. i don't dance at all. that whole ballet thing has been written out of my character.
Imogen: what did you say your name was again? wait, why am i here again?
* Dallas: hey did you two ever, y'know?
Imogen and Becky: what?
Dallas: wanna get with me? you know, a Nicki Minaj tree?
* Clare: Simpson! make your pep talk quick, i'm gonna have to report you soon.
Simpson: Pill's a pill. i worked on that one in the mirror all morning. hey you'll find your way, it's scary but remember: life is nothingness. i'm gonna be at a school in Kenya.
Clare: that's fantastic, Mr. Simpson, you'll make a fine principal over there.
Simpson: no i'm gonna be the janitor.
* Armstrong: and now the graduating class! (polite applause) as you have heard, all of our students are quite accomplished and will go on to do great things. all except Clare. Clare Edwards has decided to be a bum.
* Imogen and Becky are shouting loudly and doing the conga dance.
Becky: CONGA CONGA CONGA CONGA
the ghost of Cam: please stop, i can't hear myself think up here.
* Eli: so what is the fate of Clare Edwards?
Clare: beach bum/surfing champion.
Eli: i'll wait for you forever, my love. here, i went to the bakery and got you an eclair.
Clare: Goldsworthy you got me pregnant again. food baby.
* Eli: so what is the fate of Clare Edwards?
Clare: beach bum/surfing champion.
Eli: i'll wait for you forever, my love. here, i went to the bakery and got you an eclair.
Clare: Goldsworthy you got me pregnant again. food baby.
* summer vacation starts in two days! the Scooby van is gassed up and ready to go!
* Degrassi: it's like the mafia...
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