Justice League Action "Harley Goes Ape!"

learned:

* not a commentary on inner-city crime

* but indeed a commentary on animal cruelty

* i miss Alice.

* Gorilla Grodd: Titano, turn the way i want. Titano, i should have just wired my brain directly to yours and avoided the middle man.

* Grodd: who needs gangs? notice i call him a chimp cos i'm superior. you know you're feeling it when you use one of those swirly straws.

* Superman: there are distinctions between monkeys. including humans.

* Grodd: Titano, look up in the sky. it's a bird, it's a plane...
Titano: that no bird. that no plane.

* Grodd: DESTROY HIM, TITANO!
Titano: i'd rather think about things.

* Stargirl: this place is a ghost town. well it is Halloween. i wonder what Firestorm dressed up as?

* Harley: scatting and waltzing, my first loves. i shoulda been in show biz.

* Stargirl: i'm making a citizen's arrest!
Harley: Yankee Poodle...
Stargirl: that should have been my name, more imaginative.

* Harley: i'm kissing you. on a kid's show. i don't like you. i'm just messing with your head. psychological warfare. let the crack ship commence.

* Harley: i'm your best friend!
Grodd: and you are?
Harley: a cool character who got damaged and sexualized through the years to ridiculousness. now i'm more of a symbol of abuse in a relationship.
Grodd: hey what happened to your voice? i like the original voice better.

* Harley: it's me, Titano, Harleen! remember our song and dance? this was back when Barney was popular.

* Grodd: cease that racist song at once, human! i mean, clown!

* Harley: who are you?
Superman: relax, Harley, it's me. don't know why i didn't think of this iron suit like 50 years ago. could have saved me decades of pain and defeats.

* Cartoon Network executive: no science. action only. we are not that new Spider-Man cartoon.

* Harley: the Powerpuff Girls show is not going too well, huh?
Stargirl: it started off strong. but faded.

* Harley: before i was a shrink i was an animal shrink. i was a strong independent woman...

* in hammock together
Harley: i love you, Titano
tiny Titano: i love you, mommy.
Harley: you're going to be my only child. i don't have the best luck with men.

* Harley: *crying* if it wasn't for that kryptonite meteor, i wouldn't have seen Titano again. he'd still be flying in space to galactic dimensions unknown right now as we speak.
Superman: luckily he did crash into that kryptonite meteor. that was the last kryptonite meteor flying around in space.

* Harley: *blows nose* thank you. here's your used tissue back.
Stargirl: that's my miniskirt.

* btw, isn't keeping a used mucusy handerchief around with you in your pocket unsanitary?

* Pa Kent: hi Clark.

Pa Kent: bye Clark. Ma Clark's dead.

* Harley: headshots in a kid's cartoon? too violent.
Stargirl: my Favorability Rating just plummeted.

* Titano: i'm gonna throw you right into a speeding police van that's how smart i am.

* Stargirl: i could stop you right now with my wand but there's still two minutes left. commence the King Kong tribute!

* Harley: save that Y on the TOY sign, Titano, that Red Baron plane could come in handy.

* command voice: take the shot.
helicopter pilot: whose voice is this?
command voice: Lois Lane.

* Harley: now i'm jealous. maybe if i went back to being blonde...

* Grodd: fog of war...
Harley: tell me all about it. before we start i am legally obligated to inform you i am not a licensed therapist.
Grodd: you're not gonna sing to me, are you?
Harley: oh no.
Grodd: cos i'd like you to.